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Design By Humans
Published On: Thu, Feb 21st, 2019

THE SEX FILES: Part 2: Vegas Adventuring

Photo credit: Ralph Greco

Chris and I awoke Saturday morning to catch quick Dunkin Donuts’ coffees and eats. It can be a real eye-opener for tourists to Vegas, that off-the-strip there is pretty much an everyday, regular world of retail, hotels and everything else you’d find in any other city. As I mentioned in part 1, we had out Tit Torture For Boobs class at 11am (again, what else would you be torturing in a class like that, other than boobs?). As usual, I opened the class by introducing Chris and I, going over some safety ground rules (mainly that Chris and I—and really Chris is the one who demonstrates in our classes—do not condone any kind of kink play unless it is safe kink play and that, if we are not into something that doesn’t mean we are damning it, we just aren’t into it). As I said last time, we seemed to be too tame for the assembled, although the feedback we got during the class was peppered with lots of laughter and our ‘demo bottoms’ (the men or women who agree to come up and let you have at them for whatever your class is about) seemed to be having fun. To be frank, these days there seems to be a rise of ever more intense players on the kink scene and that kind of play (again, perfectly fine if you are being safe and everybody is consenting) is just not our cup o’ tea. And to be even more candid, I sometimes wonder if those engaging in acts that are more hardcore do so as much because they like the sensations they get as to be able to boast of how hard they can handle their kinks?

Just saying.

Catching lunch at the Hard Rock Casino, right across the street from our hotel, and a really cool place for rock and roll memorabilia, I did happen to grab my first $100.00 from the Willy Wonka slot machine. Big player that I am, Chris and I then Lyfted to The Mob Museum, well downtown in Las Vegas. Again passing laundromats, wedding chapels, pawn stores; downtown, ‘real’ city stuff of the city. Once again I experienced “ridesharing,” something quite new to me and in a city like Las Vegas you can certainly meet and gab with lots of interesting folks during a rideshare.

Lots of fun interacting with people, I should do more of it.

A huge place filled with crime exhibits, pretty much concentrated on organized crime in the Las Vegas area, Chris and I scoured the three floors of the Mob Museum’s weapons, ‘fixed’ gambling devices, mini movies and even a pamphlet sent out around the time of the Lindbergh kidnapping (like I say, not every piece in the place had a Vegas slant to it, but most did) showing the serial numbers of the ransom money to be on the look-out for. We had time to hit the speakeasy located in the basement of the museum, a pretty happening spot working hard to keep an old tradition alive. Very cool stuff indeed.

Back to our hotel to clean up, we made an appointment at the Erotic Heritage Museum that night for the first of their ‘Soul Food Nights.’ Just before running into the EHM, we did happen into the massive Planet 13 dispensary I mentioned before. It was a rainy windy night in Vegas (odd as that might seem) so we made short order skipping from Planet 13 to the EHM, but when we did we were greeted by some fantastic food and the wonderful company of Dr. Victoria, her husband Reverend Phil, one of the principles of the infamous World Naked Bike Ride and their friend, Nicholas. It was a conversation over a great meal that could have lasted all night, with the museum’s residency show Puppetry of The Penis happening right next to the lobby in their Jewel Box Theatre. But Chris and I were on a mission, as Dr. V. had managed to score us a couple of tickets to see Saturday night’s late night show of Absinthe, the live naughty over-the-top one-ring acrobatic, variety/vaudeville/burlesque, balancing act evening not to be believed. It all happens under a ‘Spiegeltent’ (a travelling tent made of wood and canvas usually decorated with mirrors and stained glass, first built in Belgium) on the grounds of Caesars Palace.

Absinthe is really something to experience. The audience is gathered together right around a very small stage that rises and tilts on occasion and the acts that appear, duos, trios, solos and quartets, strip pretty much to not very much at all and balance on each other, whip around wearing roller skates, undulate in a bathtub, twirl down from the ceiling, balance on a tower of chairs, all under the bawdy emceeing of The Gazillionaire and his horny assistant Penny Pibbets. The jokes are wildly inappropriate, the audience interaction spot-on and it was as much a delight to gander at all those perfect performers’ bodies (yes male and female, I can appreciate both when they are as beautiful as the Absinthe folks’ bodies are) working through their routines as everybody allowing a big exhale from how careful we all have to be these days to enjoy the humor of racial stereotypes and jokes of bad taste.

Chris and I were as much impressed by the cast as we were the crew and we were in agreement why Absinthe is such a well-sought out ticket on the strip. We were also treated expertly by the show’s box office staff and especially its manager, Rachel, who really went above and beyond to find our accommodations, when I had less than perfect proof of my comps for the night. I was very impressed with how well oiled this machine is, really.

That whole day and night in Las Vegas it was raining…and windy, so Chris and I made our way ‘up the strip’ walking through casinos and taking trams. Setting through the Bellagio where Chris hit the bathroom and I won $40.00 waiting for him playing a slot machine, we crawled our way to the ARIA (via the aforementioned tram) and eventually the new Park MGM that used to be the Monte Carlo then once again grabbed a Lyft back to our hotel. Arriving at 12:30 this night (yes, crazy Vegas partiers we are) we did manage into the dungeon this night to see if we could spy anyone from our class and just have a look around…purely for research purposes, of course.

I don’t know rightly how to describe the make-shift dungeons built and how well-manned they are at kink conventions. Imagine big hotel ballrooms, their room separater walls opened up completely, and across carpeted spaces, little stations where St. Andrew’s Crosses, massage tables, tarps are laid out and set up and various kinky activities ensue. There is a strict code of conduct to these gatherings, men and women called “DM” (dungeon masters), walk the floor all night to make sure nothing happens that is not supposed to and people ‘play,’ with either their master or mistress, a significant other or maybe somebody they just met at the convention. Nudity is the order of the day (night) here with lots of slapping leather to skin, plenty of growls and screams and not a fair share of climaxes reached. Across the hallway from the big dungeon was the medical room, where acts of a more specific medical nature were occurring.

Yes, it is unique to be sure, but mainly Chris and I had a look-see (just to unwind from the night more than for any voyeuristic need) and Chris availed himself of an empty massage table to stretch out his back.

Twenty minutes later we were back in our rooms and in bed.

Chris had an earlier flight than me, so I stuck around, kept one eye on the big screens at the Hard Rock for the Super Bowl and the other on good old Willy who made me even more money. It was fun to grow my stash of cash (small that it was) and then grab an In & Out Burger, before I had to get to the airport and hop on the red-eye home.

All in all, a chance to hang with my buddy and fellow naughty writer M. Christian is really what all this is about. And we once again made ourselves known in the kink world and enjoyed a little more of that all-too-unusual flavor that is Las Vegas.

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THE SEX FILES: Part 2: Vegas Adventuring