As you see here at The Sex Files, from time to time I will expound on a studio offering up a bunch of new scenes, give you an interview from an adult star, or come to highlight some new naughty gizmo. I never play favorites, I just take what comes across my desk, watch it, give somebody a call across Skype or plug it in. I had a chance to check out Tracy’s Dog’s Hammer Wand Massager and below is what I found.

In a case of ‘guys-you-shan’t-have-to-be-working-so-hard; ladies-you-can-lay-back and enjoy,’ I must admit I have always been slightly leery of anything, let alone a sex toy, that claims to do lots of things. This massager, which seems at first to be just a simple wand vibrator with three squishy attachments, actually does deliver in its multiplicity. Paraphrasing what Timothy Leary advised us to do many moons ago, with this vibrator one can, “Turn On, Tune Up and Let Go,” with the attachments here, plus the wand’s usual round head. This is high-end intimate product making and from what I managed with some deep research (I really go to such lengths for you, my gentle readers), this is one strong sucker that’s hard to beat…when it comes to beating-off.

Packaging

Tracy’s Dog outfits this toy in exquisite packaging. The hard box the wand and its attachments come in, (the attachments are all bagged separately), the simple instructions, a hypo-allergic drawstring bag for the toy, all of it is expertly rendered in an oh-so-discreet design. There is no chance for slippage or damage in mailing and transportation, which one certainly wants these days buying sex toys off the web (below I give you the URL where to order this wand).

I have seen (and yes, experienced) a wide chasm of difference in how sex toys are packaged, from stuff like this—tight, discreet, safe—to haphazard. I must say, in the case of sex toys in general, and this is a very good rule of thumb when buying stuff like this…how well a toy delivers is often a case of judging a book by its cover. The shape of the toy as well as its pretty packaging often indicates how much care was put into the toy’s overall construction.

Power/Speed

This wand has a motor capable of delivering 8000 RPMS, with three super speeds and five vibrate patterns to answer all anyone could ever want of the low hum to the big full banging vibrator experience. As you’d expect (and damn well hope) you can increase and decrease the speed of this toy and change vibrations from a consistent thrumming all the way to a staccato attack. Quite frankly, for many mere mortals, the application of just the round head of the wand proper at even medium speed will send most ladies (and even men) to the moon; the good and bad of wand play since wands came into existence. The fun here is not only finding which attachment is best for you and whatever body part you like to vibrate, but marrying each attachment to the correct speed and vibration for your particular needs.

As we find with wands in general, the width of the ‘head’ here covers the full area of a lady’s pink parts in a way that few other vibrators ever really accomplish.

Attachments

Oh boy, there’s a lot of fun to be had here! Beyond the wand’s all-purpose round head, already mentioned, Tracy’s Dog offers an anal bead attachment, a G-spot ‘Rabbit’ bunny ear stimulator (with a little trying, a guy could push some of his penis through the two double prongs with this piece) and the multi-tongue licking ‘cup,’ which wiggles and vibrates in a whole bunch of nasty ways.

The Rabbit attachment (with one thick short sturdy ‘ear’ for insertion/one for clitoral stimulation) plants a lady nice and solid. It might take a little maneuvering to get the insertion right, especially if the wand is on, but the work is well worth it. The anal plug piece, a strong yet smooth vertical piece of graduated beads, is perfect for what ails you ‘up there.’ I do advise caution of course, both in speed and vibration when feeding anything into your—or anybody else’s—anus. The tongue-‘wheel’ is nice and large; one can easily apply it just about anywhere. Again, it’s good for various male and female parts. This is really the only attachment here that works well being used on areas other than just those ‘down south’.

These extras are soft, malleable but strong, what one always wants a sex toy to be made of the very best hygienic and hypoallergenic materials. But when any of these pieces get to strumming from the wands various speeds and different vibration patterns…well, let’s just say one might never go back to just the wand’s round head again.

Rechargeability

In this day-and-age, we have lots of power sources available…and the Hammer Wand Massager takes full advantage of being easy (and quick) to recharge. It takes only a mere three hours to charge the wand fully, via a USB chord, with the charge lasting for a full three hours (but to use the wand for a straight three hours you are going to have to either work you and your partner to some amazing stamina or call up a few more people!) Cordless and fancy free once this substantially weighted wand is ready to go, you can pretty much take it anywhere for just about anything.

Cons

There’s very little about the Ultra Wand Massager that I don’t like. But I did notice that even with a short amount of time using the thing it did get quite hot, not the head, but the handle of the wand itself. But that’s all I’d have to say negative about this toy.

Man or woman, or for couple play, wand vibrators are certainly welcome by many and in fact, all the rage for lots of ladies in their solo play. Tracy’s Dog Cordless Ultra Wand Massager is a good bet for your bedroom and can be found here.